Saturday, August 9, 2008

The Trouble With A Lie

Human beings are funny creatures. 

We pull a "stupid." Just doing something that is incredibly wrong and dumb. Then, when the heat is on, we pull another stupid to try and cover it up. The thing is, when we decide to behave this way, eventually we're not just pulling a stupid anymore -- we've become one. 

Unfortunately for John Edwards, pulling a stupid is where he ultimately shines. (Well, that and his hair.) 


But John did something naughty. He had an affair. This is not naughtier than other people's affairs... this does not make him unelectable (look at Bill Clinton). He just went through a period in 2006 where he chose not to keep it in his pants when he was out and about. This is, of course, not showing the best of character, but the American people have overlooked this before in many a president. 

But when news came out about his affair (and the supposedly resulting "love child"), he denied it. In my opinion, this was pulling another stupid. I think it's always best to 'fess up immediately and at least maintain your future believability. This was, however, not the choice he made. He decided to lie about the affair and say that the child wasn't his... and then one of Edwards' employees, Andrew Young (also married, by the way), confessed to fathering the baby. 

The object of John Edwards' former affections was then whisked away to a three million dollar house in Santa Barbara, California. And Andrew Young was living as a kept man in a 5.4 million dollar house, also in Santa Barbara. 

Here's where it starts to get funny. John Edwards denies making any payments to cover up the affair, but told the press that others might have made payments on his behalf without his knowledge. Woo-hoo. Apparently all that conditioner has sunk in and affected his brain power. We're now expected to believe (from an admitted liar, no less) that the woman with whom he had an affair was also having an affair with his employee who happened to knock her up. They both ended up going to Santa Barbara, California - and moved into houses neither of them could possibly afford. But John Edwards knew nothing about any of this.

Of course, the story heated up when Edwards was seen meeting with the object of his former affections last month in a hotel room in Beverly Hills. Before this meeting, it had kind of died down, what with Andrew being the "Daddy" and all. But now that he was caught meeting with the beautiful blonde, he felt he needed to address the issue and let people know that he was meeting with her because he had wanted to try to keep her from revealing the affair. (This actually deserves a hearty guffaw.) Of course, we're supposed to believe this because he didn't know this was already taken care of with the Santa Barbara house and financial support. 

The press asked him how he could have cheated on his wife and good ol' John noted that his wife's cancer was in remission during the affair. I see. Well, that makes it all better.  The meeting last month? We can rest assured that nothing frisky happened in that hotel room because his wife's cancer is back? I don't know about you, but if I wanted to meet with someone attractive in an effort to encourage them NOT to let out that I find them attractive... I would probably not do it in a hotel room. But maybe that's just me. 

Edwards said in a statement to the press that he had denied the tabloid reports because "most of the details were not true." Then he said, "But being 99 percent honest is no longer enough." Methinks that if you deny having an affair with somebody with whom you had an affair, you cannot claim 99 percent honesty. But never fear -- the politician within John Edwards is not dead, even if his political career appears to be. In his interview with "Nightline," Edwards claimed to be ashamed of his conduct and then stated that "over the course of several campaigns, I started to believe that I was special and became increasingly egocentric and narcissistic." It takes a true politician to stand up and eat a bit of humble pie with one true statement like this and then follow it with another pack of lies. 

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